People always told me "My twenties sucked". They went on to explain how this decade was filled with mistakes, failures and figuring out who you are. In many ways I've always felt mature for my age, and I kind of thought that I knew myself, and
my twenties would not be that hard, because I
have it all figured out. HA! I guess that is what people in their twenties say, huh?
Well, I also understand why so many people tell you to wait to get married, and wait to have children and all those things. I have not regretted my choices, because I am so very very blessed. However, it is hard to deal with figuring out who I am as a woman of God, who I am as a friend, a daughter, a sister, and then I went and added the roles of wife and mother to mix it up a bit. What makes adding those roles hard is that it seems easy to define myself by them. In a way, this isn't the wrong thing to do, because I believe they are my greatest roles, and my most important. The trick is figuring out who I am beside those roles... who is
Carrington?
I don't know if you guys are like me, but I despise filling out anything that asks the question, "Who are you?" on any of these website profiles. I hate filling in the "about me" sections because when I write "about me" it doesn't ever feel "like me", and I don't know
if I am just horrible at communicating who I am, or if I don't identify with the things in my life or where I am at in my life, or if I simply don't know who I am.
I started thinking about all of this when I signed up to have my blog made over by
these lovely ladies. I wanted to think about what was "me", so that I could communicate what I wanted for my new design. I have not started the design process yet, but I'm sure it will be hard for me. I feel like I like so many different things, not one would just fit. Can I have a circulating theme that changes with my mood? Like a mood ring for my blog. One day it will say
girly, feminine and cute. Another day it will say chic, modern, simple. Another day it will say earthy, creative, natural. Another day it will be quiet, reflective, soft.
I don't feel lost, scared or out of sorts about all of this, just reflective. I'm enjoying getting to know myself, and how I am beautifully and wonderfully made. My hope is that when I figure it out, I can share it, and find the greatness God created within me, so that I can change the world.
About two years ago I attended a personal development seminar I guess you would call it, that was a series of things that went from a weekend, to a week, to a six month process that changed my life. During this process I wrote down my "purpose" statement and I wanted to share it with you all. I believe that even though I am continually figuring out this whole thing, this statement continues to
resonate with my heart:
My purpose in life is to create dynamic and extraordinary change in the world around me on behalf of and through Jesus Christ.
